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Dear Wisdom Teeth,
You're probably wondering why I've singled you out amid the other 24ish teeth in my mouth, but that's because you in particular are making my life hell at the moment. Okay, so yeah, your friends Molar and Incisor and I have had our problems in the past, there was also that isolated incident in 2005 when one of them literally crumbled in my mouth like a biscuit that had been left in a cup of tea for too long, but this time... I'm talking just to you.
First of all, lets begin with your name. Who are you to just presume that your presence grants wisdom? You nutjobs. You so far have brought nothing but pain and misery as you've poked and prodded and bled your way into my mouth, and I'm seriously considering taking up some kind of lawsuit for false advertising. There is not an ounce of extra wisdom to be seen!
Now we've tackled that, lets move on to your purpose. Now you may think who am I to question your uses, but I simply must protest against your existence when you appear to do literally nothing. I gag when I brush you because you're simply too far back in my mouth, so how food reaches you for you to do your so called 'job' of chewing, I'll never know. Be sure to let me know if you actually get any of the goods during meal times, and then I might reconsidering labelling you USELESS.
I'm sure you can sense my want to bring some serious pugilistic rage upon you not just for your pointless existence but also many other reasons. You seem to bring me nothing but misery, and this misery is only to continue when I eventually give in to this constant pain and nausea and visit a dentist, one of my least favourite things to do in life. Ever.
So, the point of this letter was to simply make it clear if you haven't gathered already that I hate you. I will always hate you. I've hated you from the moment you first appeared through my gums, bleeding your way into the world like a tiny little annoying volcano erupting in my mouth. And I will continue to hate you, whether you lead a full and pointless life in the depths of my jaw, or whether your ultimate demise occurs with a minor operation, extracting you from this place.
So, to sum up; you bring nothing to the table.
Yours in pain, bleeding gums, headaches, ear ache and severe bad moods,
Emmah xo
You're probably wondering why I've singled you out amid the other 24ish teeth in my mouth, but that's because you in particular are making my life hell at the moment. Okay, so yeah, your friends Molar and Incisor and I have had our problems in the past, there was also that isolated incident in 2005 when one of them literally crumbled in my mouth like a biscuit that had been left in a cup of tea for too long, but this time... I'm talking just to you.
First of all, lets begin with your name. Who are you to just presume that your presence grants wisdom? You nutjobs. You so far have brought nothing but pain and misery as you've poked and prodded and bled your way into my mouth, and I'm seriously considering taking up some kind of lawsuit for false advertising. There is not an ounce of extra wisdom to be seen!
Now we've tackled that, lets move on to your purpose. Now you may think who am I to question your uses, but I simply must protest against your existence when you appear to do literally nothing. I gag when I brush you because you're simply too far back in my mouth, so how food reaches you for you to do your so called 'job' of chewing, I'll never know. Be sure to let me know if you actually get any of the goods during meal times, and then I might reconsidering labelling you USELESS.
I'm sure you can sense my want to bring some serious pugilistic rage upon you not just for your pointless existence but also many other reasons. You seem to bring me nothing but misery, and this misery is only to continue when I eventually give in to this constant pain and nausea and visit a dentist, one of my least favourite things to do in life. Ever.
So, the point of this letter was to simply make it clear if you haven't gathered already that I hate you. I will always hate you. I've hated you from the moment you first appeared through my gums, bleeding your way into the world like a tiny little annoying volcano erupting in my mouth. And I will continue to hate you, whether you lead a full and pointless life in the depths of my jaw, or whether your ultimate demise occurs with a minor operation, extracting you from this place.
So, to sum up; you bring nothing to the table.
Yours in pain, bleeding gums, headaches, ear ache and severe bad moods,
Emmah xo
1 comment:
I too can feel your agony. Wisdom tooth out, Wisdom in. Surely someone somewhere made a design error in the form one extra "wisdom" Teeth!!!
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